Feeling Disconnected

Alexandra Symeonidou
Mar 22, 2024
2 min read

Updated: Mar 22, 2024

& Surviving in our Little Bubbles

Having worked therapeutically with quite some clients, observing even more people outside the therapy room, and feeling obliged to do the same thing to my own self, I have now come to the conclusion that connecting with people might be one of the most difficult things one may be asked to do in life.

I know it may sound clise.

But is it really?

How much courage does one need to let one enter our own personal bubble and feel vulnerable with them?

How much courage does it take to do so accepting they may one day leave?

Or accepting they might see the parts of you, you don't really like yourself?

It takes tones of courage.

And that's why it’s easier not to do it.

And maybe also safer.

The thing is; you still feel disconnected. You have fun but you do not connect, you speak but you do not share, you care but you do not love. You survive in your little bubble.

My friends and family always tease me for turning of my data whenever I am not using my phone. As a psychologist I could not help but wonder why I do that. I could find million of explanations, some of them fun to share, some of them easy to guess and some other ones a bit more tricky. But I did come to an overall realization in the end;

Connection and Disconnection is one button for us nowadays.

It’s that easy.

And we do it every day.

Do not get me wrong. We have the freedom to choose when and with whom we want to connect and that's wonderful. But and the same time we always have the safety net of absolutely disconnecting. Whenever we feel unsafe or challenged in any way we can just avoid or disappear. And this creates loses, loses that might hurt anyone involved.

Running away from connection can have a lot of faces; it can be constantly traveling, it can be constantly swiping, it can be finding imperfections to everyone that approaches you, it can be using sarcasm, it can be avoiding people that you start having feelings for or that they have feelings for you, it can be talking about everyone’s else’s emotions but your own.

I don't know how we can get better at connecting. I guess we are all practicing and we are all learning healthier ways to deal with our fears -the truth is therapy can help a great deal with that-. However, this demands the courage to even give it a shot with people who approach you or surround you, to take these first steps that always tell you to keep a backup or to run away.

My friends and family always tease me for turning of my data

whenever I am not using my phone.

Connection and Disconnection is one button for us nowadays.

But if we are brave enough…

“We get to choose who we let in to our weird little worlds.”

Robin Williams

Written by Alexandra Symeonidou, MSc.